Things to Do When You Write:
I Love Salt, Hate Ants

I love salt. When I was a kid a used to dip my fingertips in salt and suck them. When I was a teenager, and afraid of gaining weight, I’d just lick the potato chips and throw them away. Or sometimes I’d suck on Cheetos and not actually eat them. Only in private, of course.

Then when I quit drinking, over two decades ago, my craving for salty things went away.  Unfortunately, it was replaced by a love for sugar and all things sweet. But that’s a whole other story…

Recently my taste buds seem to be changing back again. Right now I’m snacking on Mexican peanuts, very salty with a touch of lime. It’s only 10 a.m. and I already had breakfast. So, what’s that about?

I think it’s one of those, “It’s time to write, gee I’m hungry…” kind of thoughts.

Everything does seem to taste better in Mexico, maybe it’s because food is really food and doesn’t come out of a factory, doesn’t have a label of chemicals on packaging, when there is packaging.

What’s with the ants, though? These are little ones, light brown in color, so that you can hardly see them. They’re everywhere. Which means you can’t leave anything on the counters, no crumbs, no drops of oil, no spices, nothing. Can’t leave dishes, even rinsed ones. If there’s anything at all left on a plate, they’ll find it and tell all their buddies.

So if you’re constantly eating and snacking, like I am when I write, it means I’m constantly washing dishes and putting them away. But the critters are always there, always finding my negligence.

These tiny ants are rugged. I heated something up in the microwave for 2 minutes, opened the door, and an ant walked out just fine. How can that happen? I must go to the Internet and do a search for the answer, could be interesting. I don’t think I hallucinated it, did I? I hate ants.

What is it you do when you write? What do you drink, what do you eat? Or are you pristine and all Buddha-like? I once knew a painter who never drank or ate when he worked. Only tea. And he worked for 8-10 hour stints.

But I need something I can suck on when I write. Today it’s Diet Pepsi and Mexican lime peanuts, tomorrow, maybe licorice vines and mineral water, I’m open. Ideas?